From: “Shane XXXX” <XXXXX@gmail.com>
Date: August 16, 2015 at 06:20:00 AM
Subject: Muttonbone still available?
To: orders@muttonbone.com

Hi there,

I was thinking about buying one of your mutton bone sheep for an upcoming party, and I just wanted to get in contact first to make sure that you are still selling them? I know the website is there with online ordering etc, but most of the dates refer to 2009, so I just want to be sure that there is someone on the receiving end of the order before I part with some hard earned dollars for a plastic inflatable sheep. 🙂

Cheers,
Shane

From: Al Ranchhand <orders@muttonbone.com>
Date: August 16, 2015 at 8:50:00 AM
To: “Shane XXXX” <XXXXX@gmail.com>
Re: Muttonbone still available?

Hi Shane,

Yes! Our sheep are as available as ever and would love to come out and play-ay. In fact, we’re right there with you concerning our site’s age. Coincidentally, we are launching a brand new, dynamic and dare I say, funnier site late next week. We’ll also be having contests via Twitter and Facebook for mugs, tshirts, and of course, delightful sheep.

It’s the dawning of a new age in inflatable sheep, Shane. The future is ours because we can count. We can count our sheep massing on the streets and taking over. In the past, the man has kept our sheep turning on one another, fighting for ten square feet of turf. And now our sheep will eat this turf. The Love Ewe will secure our territory… Secure our turf… Because it’s all our turf! Can you dig it, Shane? CAN YOU DIG IT!!!!

Suckah!
Al Ranchhand